"The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold."
Psalms 18:2 NKJV
Innocent pain has always been for the most part a cause for scandal and loss of faith, causing someone to cry out, “Where is (was) God?” In Auschwitz, in that hellish place, so many had the greatest experience of God being present. Among them was Etty Hillesum, whose diary allows us to discover that seed of love and fraternity planted in the bloody womb of history. Etty was born in Holland to a Jewish family, religiously non-practicing. A bright young woman, she is captivated by literature and philosophy. After graduating from law school, she embarked on the study of psychology. On March 9, 1941, at age 27, she begins writing a diary destined to become one of the most remarkable documents of the Holocaust. Esther, that is her real name, works as a typist at the Jewish Council and at the outbreak of World War II and racial persecution instead of running away she decides not to abandon her family and her people. Etty embarked on a path that led her to consciously assume the role of witness and chronicler of the terrible reality contemporary to her and to become a point of reference for the people whose suffering she shared in the Westerbork transit camp, where on September 7, 1943 she boarded a train to Auschwitz from which she would never return. “I open the Bible at random and find this, 'The Lord is my high refuge.' The departure came unexpectedly, in spite of everything. We left the camp singing, Dad and Mom very strong and calm, and so did Misha. We will travel for three days. Goodbye from the four of us.”
Eleven notebooks and some letters, collected only in 1981 for the first time, offer reflections that are pearls for anyone seeking God. Initially scattered and restless, Etty finds faith again right in the midst of the great tragedy of the. Transfigured by faith, she becomes a woman full of love and inner peace, able to affirm, “I live constantly in intimacy with God.” Through faith discovered in pain she is able to help others die with dignity. Her encounter with God gives her the strength to face death with serenity, because as she writes, “Without God the world is absurd.” In grief she is able to dig up God from her innermost part, and find him alive as the source of eternal Love. “The only act worthy of a man is to kneel before God.” In her own words, the jasmine, a symbol of the beauty of life, could incredibly continue to bloom undisturbed in her soul. Only God living in one's own existence can lead one to express words like these, “My God, take me by the hand, I will follow you like a good girl, I will not resist too much. I will not shy away from any of the things that come upon me in this life, I will try to accept everything and in the best way. Warmth and security I like, but I will not rebel if I have to be in the cold as long as you hold my hand I will go everywhere then, and I will try not to be afraid. And wherever I will be, I will try to radiate some of that love, that true love for men that I carry within me. [...] Once you start walking with God you simply keep walking and life becomes one long walk.”
His life tells us that we are called to choose the hardest path, but one that leads to life: “How narrow is the gate and narrow the way that leads to life, and few are those who find it” (Matthew 7:14). We have the right and the duty not to die in indifference, and that inevitably spills over into the world we build. Try to be “thinking hearts,” as she wrote. In spite of the storms that try to drown us in the puddles of fears and uncertainties, let us kneel before God and rise up like the lilies of the field that Jesus mentioned, “If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest? Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.” (Luke 12:26-27). His journal (available at this link https://amzn.to/4eVvO3s) closes with these words, “One would like to be a balm for many wounds.” And I hope that this devotional is also a drop of balm for many wounds, even if the only oil that can heal us remains that of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:33-34).
Bible Weekly Reading Plan # 44
October 28, Jeremiah 18-19; 2 Timothy 3
October 29, Jeremiah 20-21; 2 Timothy 4
October 30, Jeremiah 22-23; Titus 1
October 31, Jeremiah 24-26; Titus 2
November 01, Jeremiah 27-29; Titus 3
November 02, Jeremiah 30-31; Philemon
November 03, Jeremiah 32-33; Hebrews 1
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